Category: Dumb

The End of SciFi is Near

ECW 

I was watching TV and just saw that something called "ECW" is coming to the SciFi channel soon. Now, not knowing what ‘ECW" was, I looked it up and much to my dismay I discovered that it’s "an alternative brand of wrestling suited to fit the SCI FI Channel’s commitment to fuel the imagination". Huh, howzat? The page goes on:

Research tells us that there’s a healthy appetite for wrestling among SCI FI viewers," said Bonnie Hammer, President, USA and SCI FI Channel. "With ECW, we’re able to deliver to those fans unique action with a twist that’s perfect for SCI FI.

What research is this? What does wrestling have to do with science fiction? Is this some sort of bid for yet more programming that is aimed at the lowest common denominator? That’s right you stupid suits, aim for the ground because it’s hard to miss. I can’t think of ANY people that enjoy science fiction that also get hot for wrestling. The only staged fighting that most science fiction fans like is between robots. This new ‘alternative programming’ is sure to provide maximum suckage and proof that SciFi will soon go the way of TechTV.

ECW on SciFi 

StreetWars is Coming…

 Street Wars Killer

 

This sounds exactly like a game my friends and I used to play when we were in high school called ‘Killer‘ by Steve Jackson Games. We used everything from eggs filled with Snap Caps (grenades) to rubber dart guns to the dreaded disc gun (high rate of fire but low accuracy). Nowadays the game Killer is heavy on the Nerf weapons, I’m glad of that. Today if your running around with a a rubber dart gun your likely to spend a whole lot of time in jail and pay huge fines for having the cops use all of their cop gear to cordon off an entire city while they look for your sorry butt.

This modern version looks to be limited to only a few plays, a hundred or so. And only water is to be used take out your target. I’m sure as this hits the mainstream more and more people will be trying this for themselves and end up getting in the news. Not in the good way either.

I’d like to know if this new version has any ties to the Jackson game, other than the premise. It’s clear that the people that run this are worried about copy cat (or lawsuits)s, you only get the rules once you have been screened and approved to play. This is about all you get from the web site:

At the start of the game you will receive a manila envelope containing the following:

  • A picture of your intended target(s)
  • The home address of your intended target(s)
  • The work address of your intended target(s)
  • The name of your intended target(s)
  • Contact information of your intended target(s)

Upon receipt of these items, your (or your team’s) mission is to find and kill (by way of water gun, water balloon or super soaker) your target(s).

You can hunt your target down any way you see fit; you can pose as a delivery person and jack them when they open the door, disguise yourself and take them out on the street, etc.

If you are successful in your assassination attempt, the person you killed will give you their envelope and the person they were supposed to kill becomes your new target. This continues until you work yourself through all the players and retrieve the envelope with your (or your team’s) picture(s) and name(s). Then you win. Cash…but first live in fear.

 

There is nothing like knowing that your being hunted to make you alert and aware of everything. Quite exhilarating, like playing paintball for weeks on end. Except that you never know when that ball is going to strike and you only get one shot.

[via Wonderland]

Street Wars 

R.I.P. Amateur Science

 

 

In my recent issue of Wired, I was saddened to read an article on how the amateur exploration of science and chemistry is being criminalized. It’s all in the interests of anti-terrorism or anti fireworks laws. Mostly the ‘dumbing down’ of science has been because of the lawsuit happy nature of our society. (Gee, could the greedy lawyers and the lawyer law makers be the root cause of this? I wonder…) When the United States no longer has people winning Nobel prizes, or creating new technology, or science classes in schools become electives, all will be lost. All of the people who cry "but letting kids play with chemistry sets is dangerous and irresponsible! Think of the children!" Bah! If you give a bright kid the right tools to learn with they won’t kill themselves. Some of the less bright ones might get some injuries from adding water to an acid or something like that, but it’s a lesson learned. If enough do that then you will weed out the idiots. Harsh I know but that’s life. You never get anywhere by hiding at home and living life through what you see on TV. Having hands on experience is what makes you learn how and why things work. Look at how popular magazines like MAKE or Ready Made are. That’s because over the recent years the whole ‘hands on lets see what’s inside the black box’ creativity that made this country what is it has been bashed about it’s head and neck by litigation. Heck, even buying parts of a healthily chemistry set can get you fined or even jailed. What is this world coming to?

Anyway, here are a few links that can help open the doors to scientific exploration: 

Household Chemistry from the International Order of Nitrogen

DIY – Hollow Out A Light Bulb

DIY – Alcohol Backpacking Stove

Scientific American’s "The Amateur Scientist"

Henley’s Formulas for Home & Workshop

Don’t break any laws with this knowledge and try not to hurt yourself. Remember that part of science is having ethics and a broader look of the world around you. Think of the impact your experiments will have on others. Be smart and responsible. And if you hurt yourself it’s your own fault.

Fork and Knife vs. Fork and Spoon

SilverwareI know a bit about what is going on here. My wife is from Asia and they have some odd table manners there. A big one is how you eat your food. Now I was brought up thinking that my fork was the primary weapon of choice when attacking a meal. I mean, what’s better than a fork for stabbing at steak and potatoes, right? My spoon was for whatever was too fine to impale or scoop up with the tines of the fork, stuff like Jello and soup. Well it turns out that other places have something against the fork as the number one go to utensil. The spoon has surpassed the fork in usefulness in these cultures all together. If food needs to go anywhere near your mouth, you use the Spoon. The poor fork has been relegated to the lowly task of loading food into the spoon and to stab at the occasional tidbit that is too far away to safely scoop into the bowl of the spoon. What a sad time it is for the fork in these far off lands. And then there is the knife, don’t get me started on the knife. In these parts, your knife has but for one purpose in it’s life: to cut. That’s it. Never is it to be used to push, prod, or otherwise assist the food onto or into anything else.

Did I mention that the inhabitants of these places are rather steadfast in their utensil beliefs? Oh yeah, to the point of having the knife ripped from your hand and replaced with the spoon and then being told that you eat with said spoon. It’s like some strange form of brainwashing once you get ‘in country’. I wasn’t prepared for it at all.  My wife’s family appeared to be sane enough but when it came to dinner time they all ganged up on me as if I had been eating peas with my knife at a state dinner! After trying to tell them and giving repeated demonstrations of my proficiency at feeding myself with a fork, I realized that as people say, ‘you can’t fight city hall’. True enough, once I gave up this silly notion my fork being a main force tool, things got better. After a while they stopped pointing and staring at me while I ate. Nothing like feeding time at the monkey house I suppose, but it’s not so much fun once they learn table manners.

Sometimes I miss my fork…

[via Simply Dumb] 

Food fight infuriates Filipinos at home and abroad